While the music plays: Mad World

All around me are familiar faces

Worn out places, worn out faces

Bright and early for the morning races

Going nowhere, going nowhere

You stay in one place for some time and you’re bound to get acquainted with the people around you. Some you may encounter just in passing, others you merely have fleeting glimpses of, but once in a while, you get to meet individuals that share the same ‘wavelength’ as you. It’s them you treasure and keep in that special locket of memories you have.

It’s not just friends and social contacts you collect along the way though. Sometimes you find yourself stuck in a project with an unpalatable character. Another day will find you working alongside someone you have absolutely no regard for, but still you persist and force yourself to plaster a semblance of a smile on your face. You get through, it’s tiring, but you survive unscathed.

Their tears are filling up their glasses

No expression, no expression

Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow

No tomorrow, no tomorrow.

Starting friendships in the workplace is precarious. It’s comparable to a tiny swiftlet that tirelessly builds its nest on rocky seaside crags. But just when it thought it has formed a good sized one for its chicks, in comes a rude human to steal and cook what was painstakingly made.

In the social sphere, what’s disappointing is that often when a problem cannonballs out of nowhere, one party gives up and refuses to mend and start over. Pride gets in the way pretty much like how a Wallnut stands between the zombie and the sun-bearing flowers. That’s when I start to shake my head.

Pride is a tough nut to crack, pun intended. The only way to get past it would be if it’s broken down from the inside out. There’s nothing wrong if you want to take a stand for something, but you better not take for granted the fact that, as Benjamin Franklin quotes, ‘to be humble to superiors is duty, to equals, courtesy, to inferiors nobleness.’

And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad.

The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.

I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take

When  people run in circles it’s a very, very mad world, mad world.

Bidding adieu in the middle of an uncomfortable situation is always awkward, especially if you’re not really sure of the reason behind the silence. I’m trying to force myself to think that the reason’s something of substance but I’m inclined to believe that it’s as shallow as a babbling brook. This environment has truly been the best work environment I’ve been in, and I was hoping to leave with better memories than what I have now. But as I said, I can put a smile on my face every day. I don’t mind working with tension easily palpable in the air.

What I refuse to accept is the fact that not a one bothered to move to resolve the issue. It’s nothing that a private conversation can’t solve, nothing that clear thinking and open mindedness can pull off.

It’s fun to always have someone to blame, but it gets old. It’s child’s play, and while it’s pleasurable to be that kid all the time, we have to grow up and take responsibility for our actions. It’s never too late to grow up, you call the shots, you make the choices.

Children waiting for the day they feel good

Happy birthday, happy birthday

And I feel the way that every child should

Sit and listen, sit and listen

The thirty- first is going to be a birthday of sorts, the day when I take the first step towards a different path, one that I think I may actually be en route to from the start without me realizing it. I’ve so much to learn, but I’m hesitant to leave.

Went to school and I was very nervous

No one knew me, no one knew me

Hello teacher tell me, what’s my lesson?

Look right through me, look right through me.

And this is literal. I don’t know what’s in store for me. Apprehensive, yes.

And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad.

The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.

I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take

When  people run in circles it a very, very mad world, mad world.

I remember an anecdote I was once told of a lion cub asking his mom where happiness is found. The lioness replied, “it’s at the end of your tail”. The cub ran and chased his tail till he fell down exhausted. He’s giving up, he said, since he can’t ever catch happiness. To which the lioness answered, “son, you can’t ever catch happiness. Just run fast, run free, and happiness is sure to follow.”

While the music’s on’ the thoughts just flowed. I’m not caring for coherence on this. I just want it all to come out. I had a good cry.

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